Posted by: bellinghamweddings on: July 22, 2010
I read a lot of wedding forums where brides ask the question often about how to politely invite guests but not allow children to their weddings or receptions.
Here is my open letter response to all those people.
There is no way to politely tell me that my children are not considered important enough to include in your wedding. The mere fact that you do not want them there is an insult to myself and the entire concept of weddings and marriage. In all likelihood, you will have your own children someday, and if not you will probably have nieces and nephews and close friends with children. You can’t avoid them. They are everywhere. Yes they throw tantrums, throw toys, and throw up. They eat all our food, eat up all our money, and occasionally eat poop. And we do try to get some time away from them, but miss them when we do. When an opportunity arrives to celebrate our family or friends joining in marriage, we include our children because marriage is about family and weddings even more so. When I get an invitation to anything, I assume my children are invited as well. We are a family unit and you cannot separate us into favorable and unfavorable members. In the future, when your wedding comes up in conversation and my daughter says “How come I don’t remember so-and-so’s wedding?” Do you really want me to have to respond “because you weren’t invited, dear.” ?
Besides, aren’t you going to be too busy getting married and being the center of attention to care whether or not my children are eating cake with their feet? I’m the one that has to clean them up, just keep drinking your wine and go off on your honeymoon, and 9 months later you can complain to me about kids.
August 17, 2010 at 3:09 PM
As a caterer, I try accomodate children as far as meals, making it easier for the bride, and the parents of the children. If a bride chooses to have adults only at her wedding, it’s her day, she can do what she pleases and no one should begrudge her that. As the writer stated, she could have a child 9 months from now, but if she chooses to have a wedding sans children eating up poop and cake and throwing up and throwing tantrums and making messes, then I think she has that right and shouldn’t be frowned upon for doing so.